Decisions
by KittyKatTitan
Summary: What if you were forced to choose between two guys, when you love them both? My name is Rachel Roth, and I have a decision to make. Contains BBxRae and RobRae. Story is ALOT better than summary. :D
1. The sun and the moon

**Okay, so I worked really hard on this one, guys. The next chapter should be up relatively soon. But, until then please R&R. :D All in Raven's P.O.V. This is actually inspired by my profile picture, and the image for this story.**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned, but I don't.**

**Decisions**

What if you were forced to choose? Forced to choose between light and dark? Between day and night?

Some people would pick dark. The darkness is intriguing. It's enthralling. It captivates us. There is just some thrill found within the unknown of it all... Darkness is mysterious. And us humans, we thrive on mystery...

But others may disagree. Others would argue the notion that light is better. The daytime is calm and peaceful. There are no monsters to creep out at you. Because, they know that you will see them. They wait and lurk in the dark abyss. Daytime is heavenly. When all is well...

My name is Rachel Roth. I am 19 years young. I am the product of Angela Roth, otherwise known as Arella, and Trigon The Terrible. I have long violet hair, that reaches my waist. I used to cut it, but it grows so rapidly that over time I learned to ignore the long wavy locks, and let them grow freely. I have bright violet eyes. Beautiful eyes, according to some. I am rather thin. Always have been. But, lately I seem to be getting thinner, and thinner. Maybe it's all the stress, or maybe it's purely just malnourishment. I haven't been eating that much lately..

I am a Titan. Member of what was formerly known as the _Teen _Titans. But, considering how out oldest members are in their early twenties, the name change was found necessary...

I am a superhuman. I save people on a daily basis. It's the same thing every day: Wake up, save the day, go to sleep. The schedule is rarely broken.

I have no set relationship... Technically. However, in theory I _do _have a boyfriend... But, in theory I am also a mistress...

His name is Richard Grayson. Strong, brave, and fearless. Eyes of deep blue. Hair of midnight. Heart of gold. Has been married for three and a half years to Koriand'r of Tamaran. He is our leader. Our master. My guardian.

We were never meant to be. I never expected to fall for him. Ever since I first met him, he has always been special to me. I always thought of it as a close bond of friendship, or family... He was supposed to be my brother. My protector. Nothing more..

It happened a year ago. It was unintended. Irrational. But, somehow, as our lips collided... It just felt... right. I never expected to fall for him. It was an act of betrayal... Kori was my friend. I couldn't bear to hurt her... But, as his lips touched mine once again, all rational thought was halted. It didn't matter anymore. Kori was but a distant memory... He was mine. For right now, at least.

He was mysterious. Deep. And unknown. He was darkness. He was night. He was the moon shining in the midnight sky. He was perfect...

"Hello, Rachel." A voice interrupted my train of thought.

"Hello, Gar." I smiled, softly.

Garfield Logan. A kind man. A sweet tortured soul. Lost his parents on a trip to Africa. Poor guy. He was bitten by a diseased monkey, that made his skin turn green, and yet he was still beautiful to me. He was unique. He had a poetic touch to him. There was something in his eyes, those deep emerald eyes, that touched my soul. I loved him, I really did. I swear to it. I never wanted to hurt him... I refuse to acknowledge that what I was doing would rip his heart out, if he discovered the truth.

He was bright. Like the sweet rays of the sun cascading down on my pale gray skin, in the early morning light. He was hope. Like, the light at the end of the dark tunnel...

But, that's the problem. There was a part of me that wanted to remain in the darkness. I didn't want to take that leap of faith and immerse myself in the sun's warm rays. In a way I wanted to remain in the dark, in the cold beams of the moon... I wanted Richard... But, I also wanted Garfield.

I was in love with two guys...

And, I wasn't ready to choose. Not yet.

I needed the sun and I needed the moon. I relied on them both. I watched the moon go down, in hopes of the sun's prominent arrival. I watched the sun go down, praying for the moon to come back around... And he did. Every night. Just as he always would.

**This was probably one of the most complex things I've ever written. And I have to say I'm rather proud of it. There's room for improvement as there always will be. But, I have to say, I think I'm improving. I tried to make my words flow... poetically? If that's the word. Which was rather difficult...**

**I do intend on continuing this story. I am a supporter of BbxRae, but I love exploring the relationships between Raven and Robin. It intrigues me. I know Raven was a bit OOC, but this is more of a mixture of comic book/cartoon version. I like to imagine that Trigon's hold on Raven was loosened over time. She can show he emotions more freely... **

**I would greatly appreciate some comments and constructive criticism guys. Really, I would. I don't know who Raven will end up with. I have some ideas of the ending. (It's rather tragic) But, I like to let the story write itself, rather than me influence it. :)**


	2. Mint and springtime

**Omg! Omg! OMG! Did you guys know that Teen Titans is coming back! Yes, they are. In an all new series on Cartoon Network called "Teen Titans Go!" It's based on the comedy side of being a hero, rather than action. It will come on in 2013, and it will join the DC lineup which includes Young Justice and Green Lantern. It's basically a show just like the shorts, only 30 minutes long! Do you have any idea how happy I am? *Squeal* Hehe. Although, according to the Mayans, we won't be alive when it comes out... Lol. Whatevah! They found the rest of the Mayan calender, yah know? Yesh, they did. I bet those people who prepared for the end of the world feel pretty stupid right about now. (No offense. Don't shoot me...) But, yeah. :D**

**Disclaimer: Hmm... Let's make this interesting. Here's a link to the website that tells you about the new series: **** articles/2012/06/08/teen-titans-returning-with-new-full-length-episodes**** Haha. Best disclaimer ever!:DDD**

**Decisions(:**

"We have to stop meeting like this, Richard."

Robin, now Nightwing, smirked against her pale skin. "Why?" He spoke softly, as her continued a trail of kisses down her collar bone.

"Because." She sighed. "If they find out, we're screwed."

"Guess we're just gonna be screwed, then. Because I don't plan on stopping anytime soon."

She smiled, in spite of herself.

They had been meeting in secret like this for months. In courtyards, restaurants, parking lots, and tonight, an abandoned ally way. Raven knew what was at risk. If Kori and Gar found out... She didn't even want to think about that. The consequences would be to much to bear.

"This is wrong." She said, and her heart she knew it was true. But, her mind said otherwise.

"Then why does it feel so right?" He whispered, before placing his lips upon hers.

**~:D:D:D~**

Raven quietly opened the door of her apartment complex. One her and Garfield shared.

It was around 1 AM. It was a close call.

Garfield was on patrol that night, he would be home at any minute. Even though the Titans had disbanded, Nightwing still assigned them each to go on night patrol, every now and then. It was protocol.

Rachel walked into her bedroom, one she shared with Beast Boy. She plopped down onto the bed.

His smell still lingered on her. Mint. Mint and some other fragrance, one that was purely him. One without a definite name. It was unique. Just like him.

It was a deep contrast to the usual scent of Axe and springtime she was accustomed to. The scent of Gar. A heavenly scent.

Raven rubbed her temples. She still smelt like Richard. She would have to shower, and fast. She wouldn't want to risk Garfield finding out.

And he would be suspicious, she was sure of it.

She slowly ascended into the bathroom. It was medium-sized and decorated in springtime colors. It was rather cozy, in a way.

She slowly slipped off her clothes, and placed them in the dirty clothes basket. She would have to wash them. Definitely.

Raven jumped into the shower, turning it on. The warm water felt nice.

She was in the middle of washing her hair, when she heard someone yell.

"Rae, I'm home!"

She smiled to herself. Garfield was home at last.

"I'm in the shower!" She yelled back.

Beast Boy laughed. "I would join you, but I'm way too exhausted."

"Long day?" She asked. Secretly she was kind of happy that he hadn't joined her. She wasn't sure if she had the scent of Richard completely off of her yet.

"Oh, yes. Took a lot longer than expected. I'm just glad to be home."

"Sorry. I'm glad you're home too."

Raven finished up with her shower a couple minutes later.

She frowned slightly as she stepped out. Not a trace of him remained. Just her usual scent. Lavender and spice.

She dried off and slipped on some pajamas, she had in the bathroom.

She walked out of the bathroom, trying to appear as casual as possible. Although, on the inside, she was incredibly anxious. What if he found out?

Beast Boy smiled at the sight of her. No makeup. Messy hair. Pajamas, which consisted of a light gray tank top, and black panties. This was when she was the prettiest.

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, and pulled her down onto the bed.

"Miss me?" He pecked her lips lightly.

"Very much." She tried to appear as normal as possible.

He grinned, happy with her response. "Good." He murmured, burying his head in her messy purple locks.

Raven winced. Inwardly praying that he couldn't sense her betrayal. He had keen animal senses, including a great sense of smell.

"You smell good." He smiled. "Lavender and spice. The scent of angels."

Raven let out a breath she was unaware she had been holding. It was all okay. He didn't know.

"Thanks." She mumbled back, leaning up to peck him on the lips.

"No, thank you." He leaned down, capturing her lips with his in a fiery kiss.

Raven kissed him back, wrapping her arms around his neck.

She was safe, for now at least.

She smiled, and allowed the smell of nature to engulf her.

**Short, I know. But, I'm trying to make this story detailed and spread out, instead of short and rushed. So, bear with me guys. :) Oh, and I recommend that you guys read my fic 'Of Hellos and Goodbyes', if you haven't already. You might enjoy it.:D**

**Til' then, review my kittens!:33**

**~JuiceMyJellyfish~ -KittyKatTitan-(:**


	3. Her beast and her birdy

**I'M BACK! (Dodges bullets) Sheeshhh... Was I reallly gone THAT long? Haha. Sorry guys. Stuff has been banaynays around here. Many apologies mah lovelies. :L **

** Disclaimer: Story may not be updated for awhile. (momentary hiatus) School is back, ya kno? That stuff makes it hard to update... :/**

**Decisions(((:**

Violet eyes fluttered open, daylight creeping through the deep green curtains of their room.

She yawned softly, curling her back upwards, and stretching her arms above her head. She was sore, which was to be expected from last night. Beast Boy's animal side didn't just affect his sense of direction, it also affected other things...

She groaned, and curled backwards into the covers. Her body ached, and sharp pains shot through her. That was another difference between Gar and Dick. Richard was soft and slow. Garfield was rather quick, and although not upleasant, he could at times be very rough.

Speaking of Garfield, where was he? As if an answer to her unasked question, the sent of eggs, bacon, and sausage filled her nose. Tofu, of course. But eggs, bacon, and sausage, none the less.

She rose slowly out of bed, tossing the cover off of her. She looked down at her legs, and noticed blue and purple bruises all over both of her thighs. She sighed, and walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.

Sure enough, there he was flipping a pan of eggs over the stove. Adding it to a plate of other various breakfast foods.

"Morning, beautiful." He said, walking over to kiss the top of her forehead. "How did you sleep?"

"Good enough." She spoke softly, taking notice of the fact that he was already dressed for the day. "You're having to leave early I assume?"

"Yeah." He sighed. "There just isn't enough hours in the day. Have to come in early. Jonathan called in sick."

"I see." She whispered. She should've expected this. He often was called in early to work. Jonathan, that bastard. He practically called in sick every other day. Just to get out of work. He'd get paid for the day, but Gar was still reqired to fill in for him, or else Gar would be be laid off.

"Yeah. Thought I'd get up early and fix you some breakfast before I left." He smiled, placing a plate of food down in front of her. "Eat up."

She tried her best to smile back, forking some food into her mouth. She hated that he had to leave her like this. But, he had to work to pay for the apartment. Plus, he was having to feed an extra mouth, that being hers.

"You okay?" He asked softly, brushing her bags behind her ear.

"I'll be fine." She whispered. "I just miss you when you leave."

He frowned. "I miss you too, hun. So much. But, it'll get easier over time, I promise." As if on cue, his watch began beeping.

He sighed dissapointedly. "Well, I'm off." He picked up his jacket from the kitchen chair, and pecked her lips.

"I love you." He said, opening the front door.

"Love you, too." She offered him a small smile, and he returned it, closing the door behind him.

She cringed as the door clicked shut, trying to fight back tears. He had been working for months in a business firm, she should be used to this by now. But, she wasn't. She hated to see him go.

A familiar tune inturrupted her thoughts. She walked slowly into the living room, and picked up her IPhone 4 from the couch.

The black screen lit up brightly. _'One new message' _it read. She clicked on it, and smiled as she read who it was from.

_'Morning, gorgeous. You sleep well? -Richard'_

_'I suppose so. How about you?' _She typed back.

The familiar 'ding' happened again, as she received another message.

_'I missed you. Thought about you all last night. Is Gar home?'_

She grinned brightly, quickly typing a reply. He did that to her. One second she was upset, the next she was happy. He was her own little ray of sunshine.

She glanced down, as the screen lit up once more.

_'Come over.'_

That was all she needed to hear.

She quickly got dressed. She slipped on a pair of skinny jeans, a light blue tank top, and some Vans. She quickly hurried out the door, grabbing her black purse as she went.

She hopped into her white Lincoln, one that Beast Boy had bought her, and drove away. All thoughts of her beast were gone, her mind solely focused on the birdy that awaited her...

**Gosh, cliffhanger I know! :P Sorry, next chapter will be better. May be ****awhileee before I update, with school and all. Butt, I shall NOT aboandon this. It's all good. No worries. ;) Haha. Review!**


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